Just open wide….

Last Sunday the people of Malamocco celebrated the annual festa of the Madonna di Marina.  Like a few other festivals — the one at Pellestrina on the first Sunday of August comes to mind — it is based on a legend involving a miraculous apparition of the Madonna.  I’ll get to that in a moment.

What is reliably involved each year at Malamocco is a small sale of old and often eccentric stuff.  I would say “antiques,” but that might be glamorizing them too much.

So forget the glamour, and while you’re waiting in line to pick up your plate of spaghetti alla malamocchina (with tiny clams called bevarasse), feast your eyes and your memory on this item.  Anybody under the age of 50 probably has no recollection of it, but for the rest of us, I’m betting it still can bring on the shudders.

If Proust had ever sat in one of these, “Remembrance of Things Past” would have had a dramatically different beginning.  Of course the column with the lamp and the small sink for endless spittings-out are not in their correct position, which I suppose means you could have bought them separately.  But that would be crazy.
This sink was especially grotesquely huge when I was six, or however little I was when the dentist began his oral excavations. The sound of the water swirling around the inner edge only slightly masked the sound of the drill. End of reminiscences, you can go back to Proust now.

Speaking of Malamocco, you might want to know that the name is derived from Metamauco, by way of Medoacus, the Roman name of the Brenta River, which emptied into the Adriatic here.  Could be useful on a crossword puzzle sometime?

It was originally a small settlement of families who cultivated vegetables, fished, and worked in the salt pans.  The population grew in 452 A.D. with the fleeing dwellers from the lagoon shoreline seeking refuge from Attila’s Rome-bound hordes.  It became the seat of the Venetian government between 742 and 811.  In that year the new doge, Agnello Partecipazio, moved what was becoming Venice to the Rialto area and Malamocco returned to its earlier dimensions.

As for the Madonna di Marina herself, a legend springing from around the year 1300 tells of a certain Felice Dario, native of Malamocco, who found an enormous stump of wood lying on the beach and took it home to chop it up as firewood.  (To give a more precise idea of this object, it’s called a ceppo [CHEH-po] in Italian, and while you certainly can burn it, it is more typically used as that heavy block on which you chop wood, or on which a butcher cuts meat, or on which a blacksmith places his anvil, or on which the public executioner places his customer’s head, etc.)  In Venetian, the word is zoco (SOH-koh).

The ceppo disappeared three times, and three times Signor Dario found it back in its original place on the beach, at which point the Virgin appeared to him.  The story ends there, though I suppose we could risk imagining miraculous cures and victories at sea and and platoons of male children and other beautiful things as a result.  For the first years —  no idea how many — the miracle was attributed to the “Madonna del zoco,” the “Madonna of the stump of wood used for chopping things on.”  Somebody clearly thought that didn’t have the right ring to it, but I disagree.

I would tell you more about the festa, but the real point of this post isn’t the regata, or the procession, or the band, or even the (excuse me) Madonna and her chopping block.  It’s the dentist’s chair.  If I’d anywhere to put it, I’d have bought it and sat in it and rinsed my mouth and laughed triumphantly all day at the ghosts of all those dentists I’ve worn out.

 

Continue Reading